Link has a mugshot, even.
According to NBC Toledo, Ohio, affiliate WNWO-TV, the videos show Price tilting the metal round picnic table on its side and then laying up against it to have sexual intercourse with the table. Afterward, he can then be seen cleaning the table and the deck.
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to bringing the table inside his home for sex.
Let me emphasize and important part of the quote - BRINGING THE TABLE INSIDE HIS HOME.
I mean, you can schtup whoever, right? I totally support everyone's right to schtup everyone else in the world with consent, as well as the right to pleasure yourself in whatever ways you gotta do it. Whatever.
But a TABLE? a TABLE?? There's weird, there's deviant, there's people who find things like goatse and tubgirl hot - and then there's this.
I'm not going to be able to go shopping for patio furniture this spring without sorta thinking about this.
(he may be charged with public indencency - apparently some witness saw him, took video, burned it to dvd, and then dropped it off with the police, according to this article. There may be charges relating also to the fact that he was doing it in view of a school. Genius.)